Waiting for our Child

He is Here!

2011-08-17T06:29:00.000-07:00

It's a.........

2011-04-04T09:49:00.001-07:00

Little BOY!!!!!!!!

We are thrilled!!!! Cant wait to meet him in August!!!!!!!!!!

Look How Baby has Grown!

2011-01-20T11:59:00.000-08:00

Baby's First Pictures and MK is 1!!!!

2011-01-05T09:41:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that my precious miracle child is one year old. Where did the time go? I feel like I blinked and it was over. How do I slow it all down? I am just going to have to try to take in each smile and each tear. Celebrate every little thing that she does. Before you know it we will have our second child and time will go by even faster. Here are some pictures of MK as of late and the fist pictures of our new little one due August 16th!

Christmas Suprise!!!!

2010-12-16T11:58:00.001-08:00

The second test in this picture is one my husband took just as a control!

Shutterfly!!!!

2010-11-17T16:13:00.000-08:00

You must check out THIS deal for bloggers!!! How awesome!! 50 Free holiday cards from Shutt*rfly!!! They have such awesome designs. I am working on mine as we speak! They have such a wide range of styles to choose from in their Christmas and holiday cards. This is the one I picked! I picked it becuase of the cute colors and the layout. I plan on using one picture of the three of us and the other two of MK. I have always had such a wonderful experiance with Shutt*rfly! It is so user friendly. All of the cards are so cute. There is one for every style. I am also going to be using Shutt*rfly for MK's first birthday card. Here is the super cute card! The theme for her birthday party is cupcakes. So this card fits just perfectly. I am telling you, you have to check out all of their oh so cute cards. It will be time well spent.

And for your viewing pleasure, a little late, MK's 9 month pictures!!!! Enjoy.

Wordless Wednesday

2010-09-01T11:53:00.000-07:00

6 Month Pics

2010-07-27T08:22:00.000-07:00

MK is now 7 months old. Can you believe it? Here are her recent 6 month pictures.

Baby brother or sister????

2010-07-02T08:52:00.000-07:00

You will never believe what this post is about!!!! MK is gong to be a big sister!!!! No, I am not pregnant, but we are adopting another miracle. That is exactly what this is, a miracle. We got a call about three weeks ago. We have been chosen by a birthmother. I was SHOCKED I tell you. I was sitting there with a 5 month old in my lap. It was a bit overwhelming. But I am super excited. We had to think about it for a few days, but decided we really wanted to go for it. This means that MK and her little sibling will only be 11 months apart. I am going to have my work cut out for me, but I am ready to take on the challange. How blessed are we??!!!!! We will find out the sex of the baby next Thursday! I will keep you posted!

She is going to be a big sister!!!!!

Better Late than Never

2010-05-17T13:19:00.000-07:00

Here are MK's 3 Month pics. I realize that this is late. She is 4 and a half months, but I thought you would still enjoy!

We are a FAMILY!!!!!

2010-05-04T11:12:00.000-07:00

It is official. MK is our daughter forever and ever! She has been my daughter since the first time I saw her on the ultrasound, but it is nice to know that it is legally finished! It was a wonderful day. MK was awesome in court and the hearing went without a hitch! It was so special to have our families there. My Mom could not be with us because of her health, but my Dad came. We are having a big party to celebrate on Saturday and are expecting a house full of people! I cannot explain how overjoyed I am to be the Mother of this precious baby girl. She is our miracle!

Monday is the day!

2010-04-30T09:04:00.001-07:00

Monday is our finalization. There is no doubt that from the moment I saw her, MK has been my daughter, but Monday it will be official. I am super nervous about getting on the stand. Does anyone have an suggestions? Please pray that MK is quiet and happy during the proceedings.

Congrats!!

2010-03-24T12:08:00.000-07:00

Congratulations are in order for my wonderful friend Chelsea. She and her husband Josh welcomed their beautiful daughter Stella Grace into the world on March 20th. DH and I went to meet her at the hospital the day after she was born. She is just precious and is such a miracle! We love you Josh, Chelsea and Stella. You are going to be the best parent and no one deserves this happiness more!!!

Here we are loving on little Stella

Follow up!

2010-03-09T12:14:00.000-08:00

The last bit of our home study is complete! It was a piece of cake. H is so warm and was so excited about MK. She did say that she thought that out of everyone she knows we were the ones who became parents the fastest. I know that it hapened really fast for us, but to be the fastest was a little shocking. We are so blessed. Of course I would have waited forever for MK. She is the greatest joy in my life. Every day is better and better! Here is a short video of our morning routine. She loves to be in her diaper and laying on her back. Sweet girl!

Follow Up Home Study

2010-03-08T10:21:00.000-08:00

Today we have our follow up home study. One step closer to MK being ours legally!!!! I am not nervous at all. H is awesome and is so comforting. I just hope she doesnt ask us any weird questions that I am not expecting. Pray for us!

Two months old!!

2010-03-03T12:50:00.001-08:00

I cant believe that she is two months already. I also cant believe that I am such a bad blogger. I need to make it a priority. MK is doing well. She is smiling more and making lots of little noises. I think she is going to be a talker. She had her two month appointment and weighed 9lbs 11oz. She has gained about three pounds since she has been home. She is also 21 inches long. Two whole inches she has grown!! She is growning so fast. How do I slow this down! She is the most wonderful thing in the world. Both sides of the family are in love with her. Who can blame them! I am anxiously waiting our court date for the finalization. She is ours now, but I am ready for it to be legal. We have our 8 week follow up with the lady who did our home study. That is sceduled for next Monday. I dont think it will be that big of a deal. Here are some two month pictures for you all.

My Valentine!!!!

2010-02-14T19:10:00.001-08:00

Look at that sweet smile. How lucky am I!!!!!

Happy Birthday!

2010-01-26T10:56:00.000-08:00

My dear sweet MK,

Today I have been blessed with you as my child for four weeks. The time has flown by. Each day you grow and change and bury yourself further into my heart. My life has never had as much purpose as it has now that you are in my life. You have made us a family. I hoped and prayed for you for the past 3 years and now you are in my arms. It has been an amazing journey to get to you and now I know that all of the ups and downs were for a reason. God had you for us and us for you. What a blessing you are. I know that my love will only grow, but that is hard to believe because I feel like my heart is already going to explode. I cherish every second with you and pray that your life will be blessed and you will know the happiness that I feel everytime I look at you.

Love,

Mommy

BAD Blogger!

2010-01-23T12:50:00.000-08:00

I am such a bad blogger. MK is almost one month and I havent updated my blog. I guess I have the excuse of being a busy new Mom. It is still sureal that I am a Mommy. Life is good and all of my dreams have come true and prayers have been answered in this one little girl. She gets cuter every day. For the most part she is a great baby. There are a few sleeping issues and some eating issues too. For the first week of her life she was in the NICU because she wouldnt eat. WE had to change her formula to soy and that did the trick. I will have to take time to blog about the whole experiance, but I just dont have the time right now. I hope that my next post will not be in another month. Just taking it day by day. I will leave you with some pictures of my beautiful daughter.

Will Post Soon, but for now......

2010-01-05T10:31:00.000-08:00

So Precious!

2009-12-29T21:36:00.000-08:00

MK has ARRIVED!

2009-12-29T21:13:00.000-08:00

Last two labor updates:

-Birth Mother was dilated 4 cm around 7 PM. Things seemed to be progressing slowly.

-Birth Mother was dilated 6 cm around 9 PM.

MK HAS ARRIVED!

MK arrived around 11:00 PM. She weighed a little over 7 pounds. The Birth Mother didn't have to push long at all. Mommy was holding the Birth Mother's hand during the delivery. Daddy cut her cord. As soon as I get more details of MK, I will post. I saw a picture of her and she is BEAUTIFUL -- so tiny and precious! I'm trying to figure out how to post a picture from my cell. If I figure it out, I will post it as well.

Mommy says that MK is very alert and looking all around. She says she has the cutest chin. I can't wait to meet her!

God Bless!

Afternoon Update

2009-12-29T15:05:00.000-08:00

The Birth Mother's induction began this morning at 7 AM with pitocin. By earlier this afternoon, she was dilated 3 cm. They broke her water and gave her an epidural. I'll post the next update as soon as I receive it!

Induction at 5 AM

2009-12-28T10:27:00.001-08:00

Hey Everyone! My name is Sea. I am honored to be guest blogging on Waiting For Our Child. I'll be sharing exciting updates on MK's arrival. Here are the beginning updates of a beautiful miracle:

- Mommy and Daddy arrived in Birth Mother's home town last night.

- Birth Mother will be induced tomorrow morning at 5 AM!

I'll be posting updates as I receive them. I am sooo happy for MK and her Mommy and Daddy!

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T08:36:00.001-08:00

Merry Christmas to everyone!!!!!!

5 day!

2009-12-24T09:03:00.001-08:00

That is all I have to say. 5 DAYS!!!!! Merry Christmas to everyone!!!!

One Week!

2009-12-22T07:26:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe this, one week and we will be parents! It is like I am living in a dream. MK's bags are all packed up. Now to actually worry about our bags. I have never had so much fun packing a bag. All of her cute things. I tend to go into the nursery and double check her bags every day. I think it is a way to bring this to reality for me. Sometimes I catch DH going into the nursery just to look. It is so precious. I have continued to have everyday contact with K. She is so very amazing. I got to speak with her daughter the other day. she was precious. She said, "Are you ready to have your baby girl? My Momma says you are going to be a wonderful Mommy." Those were some of the sweetest words I have ever heard. K has obviously done a good job preparing her children as much as possible. K told me yesterday that I was her angle. I must say that she is mine!

Baby Shower Picture!

2009-12-18T08:07:00.001-08:00

Here are some pictures from my wonderful baby shower! It was so sweet of my friends to through me the shower. We got lots of wonderful things for my sweet girl. Everything was perfect. There were days when I never thought I would have a baby shower, so it was so special for me. Thank you to Sea and Traci for all they did to make my dream of a baby shower come true! Enjoy the pictures!

Tick Tock!

2009-12-17T08:15:00.000-08:00

K went to the doctor this week. The baby looks great! She is 6lbs 6oz now. Today K is officially 37 weeks. Full term!!!!!! MK has officially dropped. K's doctor thinks she will not make it to Dec 29th. She could come anytime. let's just pray for a healthy, happy baby.

The Time is Coming!!!

2009-12-14T16:08:00.000-08:00

Only 2 weeks until the induction!!!!!!!! I cannot believe it. My sweet friends Sea and T gave me a wonderful baby shower yesterday. It was such a great day. I will post later with pictures. For right now I will leave you with one thought; TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nursery Pictures

2009-12-11T16:36:00.001-08:00

We still have a lot to do, but here are some pictures of the little one's nursery. I love the colors! It is so happy in there, but at the same time it is soothing. My mother and I made the curtains. They are lacking the valances over them, but that is because we dont have the bedding yet. I also made the rocking chair cover. I made the MK on the wall too. I got very crafty on this!!! Enjoy the pictures and if you have any suggestions on what you think I should do please let me know! 18 days and counting!!!!

Birth Mother Trip!

2009-12-06T08:40:00.000-08:00

I am back from one of the most exciting trips I have taken in my life! I drove 6 hours to go and meet K. I must say that I did not have a lot of nerves. I was mostly just excited. K is beautiful and so full of personality and life. She just amazes me. We had a great time together talking about our lives and the life of the little baby that we both love so much! I did get to go to a doctors appointment with her. It was amazing. I got to feel her move and hear her beautiful heartbeat. It was the most awesome sound I have ever heard. The doctor was so sweet and offered to do a quick ultrasound while I was there so I could see the baby. She is so cute in there. she kept opening and closing her little mouth. I love her so much!!!!!! K also help me pick out an outfit for her to leave the hospital in. It was such a positive experiance. K kept telling me how excited she is for us. She even introduced me to the doctor as the Mother of the baby. That was really cool. One very exciting this that we found out is that she is being induced on December 29th!!!!!!! The doctor wanted to make sure that we are there for the delivery. That is only 3 weeks away people!!!! I am going to be a mom in 3 weeks!!!!! So much to do.

Pictures of my Sweet Girl!!!!

2009-11-29T14:06:00.001-08:00

Here are some pics of the sweetest thing I have ever seen!!! We arrived home today to a package with lots and lots of ultrasound pics in it! I cannot believe that this is my daughter! Wow what a feeling. I am traveling to meet K this week. She wants me to go to an ultrasound with her. What an honor. I am so nervous to meet her. I really want her to like me. I mean she is intrusting us with the most precious thing in the world. I want to get to know her so that our little one will know as much about K as possible. I hope I make a good impression. I will keep you updated on how the visit is going. But for now please enjoy pictures of my daughter!!!!

Look at that profile. She is beautiful!

Sweet little button nose!

Registry!!!

2009-11-17T14:10:00.000-08:00

I can not believe that I am actually registered. DH and I had so much fun picking out cute things for our sweet baby girl. I just wanted to buy everything for her right there on the spot. My sweet friends are having a baby shower for me in December and I can not wait. My good friend is letting us borrow a ton of her daughter's baby clothes. She has some of the cutest stuff. Everyone has been so supportive and everyone is so excited to welcome our daughter. Here is a peek at some of the cute things we registered for. LOVE IT!!!!!

It's A GIRL!!!

2009-11-12T18:39:00.000-08:00

We are matched!!!!!! Imagine my suprise when I was talking to the BM tonight and she confirmed that it is a baby girl. We are sooo excited. We dont know what to do with our selves. We had a call with the BM tonight and it could not have gone any better. I felt like we were old friends. We just talked and talk. DH could hardly get a work in. Hehe. It feels so right! She is due January 7. That is only 8 weeks away. Can you believe it? I am going to be a Mother in two months. I need all of you guys to pinch me right now. Of course there is still the fear that she will change her mind, but I feel as good as I can about this situation. So just continue to pray for us and our sweet little baby. Also keep C in your prayers. YAYYYYY!!!!!

News

2009-11-11T09:19:00.000-08:00

We are considering a situation with a baby bay to be born in Jan. There is a lot of information to take in. We have had a conference call with the attorney today and we have some decisions to make. He is sending us the break down of how much it is going to cost (ugh!!!) I hate that we have to think about money right now. I want to think about feelings and such, but instead we have to consider finances. We will probably have a conference call with the BM, who we will call C. This is sooo nerve racking. What if she doesnt like us???? It is just so overwhelming. Oh well it will all be worth it when I have my baby in my arms. Please pray that God leads us to make the right choice.

Blog Award

2009-11-09T17:23:00.001-08:00

WOW!! Thanks Suzanne (http://suzanne-myivfjourney.blogspot.com/) for this awesome award. It means so much that you believe that I have had patience. It is easier when you have support from blogger friends like you.

The rules for this award are simple.

I LOVE YOU equals 8 letters which gives you 8 rules:

1-Thank the person who nominated you for this award and write a little bit about why you love them.

2-Copy the logo and place it on your blog.

3-Link to the person who nominated you for this award.

4-Nominate no more than 17 people (why 17?) who you love or you think could use some love.

5-Write one word (you can only use a word once) about what you love about their blog.

6-You cannot nominate someone who has already been nominated-the love has to spread to all.

7-Post links to the 17 blogs you nominate.

8-Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they’ve been nominated.

I pass the love on to the following:

Jenny, A Heritage from the Lord, joy

Sea, We're Expecting, patience

Baby boy????

2009-11-09T17:19:00.001-08:00

We may have a baby boy in January. Can you believe it!!!!! Stay tuned!!!!!! I will fill you in on all the details once I know them. PRAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Set Back

2009-11-04T07:39:00.000-08:00

Another set back with my Mom. She was supposed to have her mastectomy today, but her blood was too thin because of the medicine that she was on. So now her surgery had been put off until November 12. This just sucks because she is sitting there in MN just waiting. It is so hard on my parents. My Mom is feeling pretty low. Please pray for them stuck in a hotel room. I hate that I am not there with them. I need to be here with DH because his Grandmother is not doing well. It has just been a rough month. We need some good news here. On the baby front I am still waiting to hear from the attorney about the situation that we were presented about a month ago. I guess patience is being taught in all parts of my life.

Home Again

2009-10-31T11:03:00.000-07:00

I am sooo happy to be home, even though I have a cold. I have missed DH so much. It was so hard to leave my Mom in MN, but I needed to come home. DH's grandmother is not well and they think that she does not have long to live. Mom will have her mastectomy next Wednesday and then she will be able to come home a few days later. They will discuss further treatment once the final pathology is back. On the baby front there is not much to report. Praying for our baby every day. Waiting as patiently as possible. Good news though, my friend Sea found out that she was having a baby girl!!!! I am so excited for them!!! Cant wait to hold that sweet baby!

In MN

2009-10-26T08:56:00.000-07:00

Even though I am in MN (coming home tomorrow) I am soooo excited today because my friend Sea has her gender u/s today!!!! I can not wait to know if I am going to be loving on a little boy or little girl. I am so happy for Sea and her hubby! They so deserve to be happy. Congrats to my friends!

MOM

2009-10-18T17:30:00.000-07:00

So this might be a little bit of a shocking post. My Mother was supposed to have open heart surgery next Wednesday. She is at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester MN. I was prepared to fly out next Tuesday to be with her on the day of surgery. Then I get a phone call from her on Friday. She says, "Dont pack, the surgery has been postponed." What? She says that she found a lump in her breast and had a biopsy. It turns out that she has stage II breast cancer. I dont know much more. I am still flying up on Tuesday to be with her while she goes through consultations and discusses treatments. I feel like I need to be by her side. So they are putting off her heart surgery to take care of the cancer first. It is all very overwhelming. I really dont know what to think right now. I feel kind of numb. I was sort of prepared to deal with her heart surgery because she has had them for all of my life, but cancer now that I was not prepared for. I know it is all a part of God's plan, but sometimes that is hard to swallow.

Update

2009-10-16T17:38:00.001-07:00

There really is not a lot to update you on. The attorney told me that he should have an answer for me by next Wednesday. Who knows if this is true or if it would be even longer. The attorney said that he advised me to wait it out. Of course we will wait it out, what else do we do? So for now it is just try to be patient. Lisa is doing a little better. She had a very bad night the other day, but is showing signs of improvement. She has been in ICU for the past 4 weeks. The doctors still dont know exactly what is wrong with her. Another lesson in patience. We will just continue to pray. Thanks for all the support.

Prayers needed ASAP

2009-10-13T19:04:00.000-07:00

Please pray for my friend's sister Lisa. She has been in ICU for the past 3 weeks. We thought she was getting better, but tonight my friend called me to tell me that her temp has dropped very low and they think she is going into septic shock. Please please please pray that God heals her and gives her family peace.

2009-10-13T17:18:00.001-07:00

I am pulling out my hair here!!!!

Still waiting....

2009-10-12T11:00:00.000-07:00

It may be a couple more days before I hear anything. No stress at all.....

Thank you!

2009-10-11T06:55:00.000-07:00

Thank you to all my bloggy friends who have been praying. We should hear something tomorrow. The thing is that this baby was matched with another couple already, but then some new info came to light that the couple thinks might be a deal breaker for them. If they back out then we are on. I am just praying that no matter what happens this child will have a beautiful life. So I am sure I will just be staring at my phone all day tomorrow waiting on the call.

Situation????

2009-10-08T11:31:00.000-07:00

OMG! My heart is in my throat. I got an email today about a baby that will be born December 7. There are a couple of things involved that we are thinking about. The attorney will call me this afternoon. Please pray!

BM where are you?

2009-10-05T10:28:00.000-07:00

I am thinking that the match is over. Actually I am sure of it. I have not heard a word from BM or her sister. The sister wont answer my calls and I am pretty sure she hung up on me once after her son had answered her phone. I dont know why, but it is over. So now I am back to square one. I have also heard from the angency and they have no BM's right now. We are going to post an ad in the state newspaper. Let's hope this works.

Birthday!

2009-09-29T07:37:00.001-07:00

I had a wonderful birthday today. DH and I went out to eat. We never go out so it was so much fun. We went to the Mel.ting P0t. It was such a cool experiance and the food was awesome. We had a 4 course meal. There was so much food. We were in this small booth and it was so romantic. It was just the best night. It is great to mix it up every once in a while and reconnect with the hubby. I love him so much and feel so blessed to have him as my husband. God is good.

Quick One

2009-09-27T20:48:00.001-07:00

Just wanted to stop in and let you guys know that there is no new news. Just waiting and praying.

Some Word

2009-09-20T14:51:00.000-07:00

So, I got to talk to BM's sister yesterday and she said that the reason BM hasn't called is because she has been in the hospital. Apparently she has had high blood pressure. It worried me, but she assured me that BM and baby are just fine. I am supposed to get a call from the sister today, but as of yet I havent heard anything. This waiting stuff kills me. The sister did tell me yesterday that BM asked her if she had spoken to me recently and wants me to know she is still interested. So, there are still many questions to be answered, but at least I know this still might work out! Thanks for your prayers and support.

No word

2009-09-17T17:45:00.000-07:00

I am losing hope here guys. I have not heard from the BM so I am just preparing myself that this is not going to happen. I guess this is just not the baby for us. I am refusing to get emotional about this. I think I have put up a little bit of a wall around my heart. My Grandmother told me the other day that my little cousin just heard her baby's heartbeat. This cousin was pregnant after the second month of trying. Dont get my wrong I am very happy for them, but why not me? I know it sounds like I am feeling sorry for myself a bit, and yes I think I am. We all have the right to through a little pitty party every once in a while. Every pregnant person I see makes my heart hurt. Every commercial with a baby in it makes me feel empty inside. I just want to be a mother, and after over two years of TTC, many fertility treatments and one miscarriage I still have empty arms. I would like for one thing to work out. I know that God's plan for me is greater than I can imagine but I am human and I needed to complain a little. If I hear anything from J I will let you know, but I would not hold your breath. Thanks for letting me rant.

Going for it!

2009-09-13T11:08:00.000-07:00

We have decided that the Lord is really leading us to persue this adoption. We are soo excited and so worried. We have found out that the birth Mom (J) is in jail right now for drugs. So, we dont know what kind or how often she used during her pregancy. I have been speaking with J's sister and she suggested that I get a prepaid phone so that J could call me. I have already set this up and am waiting for her call. all I know is that J is very interested in placing her child with us. Still dont know exactly when she is due, or what she is having. Hope I can remember to ask her all these questions when I talk to her. I guess I should make a list. So for now I am just waiting to get her call and set things into motion!!!! I cant wait!

UPS is from God

2009-09-03T15:55:00.000-07:00

Picture a woman going to the UPS store to mail off her profile to the adoption agency. The women tells the worker there that they want to adopt a baby. At that same moment there is another woman in the store and she stops the adopter outside. She explains that she knows a woman who wants to place her baby for adoption and gives the woman her phone number. You guess it, this happened to ME!!!! I could not believe what I was hearing. Of course I cried all the way home. I tried to call the lady the next day and her phone was disconnected. Of course I thought that was it. I knew I was never going to get her on the phone. I tried the next morning just because and the phone actually rang. I spoke with the lady that we will call J that afternoon and found out all about the birth mom and the baby. She is 6 mo along and can not support a child. She wants a prrivate adoption and just wants to find a good home for her baby. The baby is biracial and we are going to have to pray about that. i gave her our lawyers phone number. I just cannot believe that we were in that place at the same time. Even if this baby is not ment to be ours I hope that our lawyer can lead her in the right direction. Please pray that we make the right choice.

Homestudy, CHECK!

2009-08-22T19:48:00.000-07:00

We are done with the homestudy...YAYYYY!!!! It only took 3 1/2 hours. And H doesn't feel like she needs to come back. It went very well. It was so laid back. We basically just talked the whole time. There was no awkward silence, or any hard questions. She just wanted to know about us. I feel like we passed with flying colors. I know that you dont actually pass a homestudy per say, but I feel like it went really well. Now we just have to wait for the rough draft. H says that she will get it back to us by the end of the week. After that she will distribute the study and we send out our portfolio. Then we wait. I feel like we are that much closer to having a baby in our arms. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

Home Study!

2009-08-20T11:38:00.000-07:00

so, tomorrow is the big day. Homestudy day number one is at 3:00pm tomorrow. As of now I am not nervous. I have spoken with H on the phone multiple times and feel very comfortable with her. She seems like such a sweet person. She said something to me last night that made me feel sooo good. She said that she could tell because I am so outgoing and because I am an open book she has no doubt that we will find our baby. This made me feel more confident about this journey. I am excited to get this show on the road. I have ordered all of our pictures so that I can start work on our profile books. I think that this is the easy part. There is so much to do and it is keeping me busy. Now when all of this is done and we are just waiting that is when I will not know what to do with myself. I will let you know how the homestudy goes. Keep it in your prayers!

Are You Out There?

2009-08-17T11:43:00.000-07:00

We spoke with D at our agency today and she was suggesting ways to get out information out there. I have set up a new email with nonidentifying information. I am changed our blog to be public with the new email address shown. Now I need to make a one page profile to distribute. The question is who do I hand these out to? OB offices? Hospitals? Can you give me a clue? I want to make sure we have covered all of our bases. What about parentprofiles(dot)(com)? If anyone has any great ideas that wouldbe great! Have I mentioned how excited I am!!!!!!

BFN = Positive

2009-08-14T20:17:00.000-07:00

So, who would have thought that a negative pregnancy test would make me so happy? Ok, so not thrilled that I am not pregant, but because I am not DH and I have decided that we are going to ADOPT!!!!!! I am sooo very excited! We already have our homestudy scheduled for next Friday. Can you believe it? I fell like I am pregnant. As I told my Aunt I am pregnant in my heart. I am going to be a Mommy. I feel like we are actually doing something here. There will be a baby at the end of it all. I have come to the realization that for me it is not about being pregant, it is about becoming a mother. I was ready to move to adoption about a year ago, but DH wasn't quite there yet. Well, he is down with it now. I am adopted myself and so adoption has always been a natural thing for me. I can't believe this is happening! Now to finish our profile books. That is going to be time consuming, but soooo worth it. Keep us in your prayers as we move forward with adopting our dream baby!

Waiting

2009-08-09T13:54:00.000-07:00

2WW, the most horrible thing when TTC! I am questioning every pich, twinge, pull, and poke. Of course I did the POAS until the trigger is out of my system. It looked like it was out about 8 dpiui (9 dp trigger). Now that I am 10 dpiui I have started the POAS to see a BFP. I think I will wait until Wednesday (13 dpiui). So in the meantime I am talkking to my "maybe baby" and enjoying being PUPO!

Details

2009-08-02T16:20:00.000-07:00

Here is DH and some of his cousin's shooting water balloons at our beach house!

I promised details of this past week, and here they are. I officially had 7 ultrasounds this cycle. That is a lot of ultrasounds. I had to drive 4 hours twice while we were at the beach to have ultrasounds. Then we had to drive 12 hours in one day to have the IUI done. It was a lot of traveling in one week. Of course if we get our BFP this cycle it will be completely worth it. Now I am in the 2ww. I had the IUI this past Thursday. My nurse says not to test until August 16th. That is 17 days from the day I had the IUI. Is this normal? I know the trigger has to be out of your system, but 17 days seems like over kill. I don't know if I can wait that long. Here's hoping and praying!

Beach

2009-07-31T14:13:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am still alive. I have been at the beach all week and have not been able to post. I do have alot to share with you. I have had the IUI this week, so now we are waiting and waiting. I will give you all the details once we get home either Sunday or Monday.

Follie Report

2009-07-22T11:53:00.000-07:00

Well, it looks likes this is going to be a very long cycle. This morning my ultrasound showed that my largest follicle was 11. I had two more at 8-9 mm. So, now I have three more nights of stiming (at 66.6) Next ultrasound is Saturday morning. We were supposed to leave for the beach this Friday, but looks like that is not going to happen. I feel horrible, because I feel like I am ruining my husband's vacation. This is just another thing to remind me that you can't control IF. More prayers are in order.

Hopeful

2009-07-21T13:06:00.000-07:00

So, after all of your comments yesterday I have decided that they only thing to be is hopeful. Thank you for your support and letting me vent. I have my next ultrasound tomorrow. Please join me in saying a prayer that my follicles have decided to respond. Sea is going with me again, so I will have great support by my side. I will let you know how it goes. I am very hopeful!

No freakin Follies

2009-07-20T13:02:00.000-07:00

Ugh! So frustrated. I had my day 9 ultrasound today and to my utter suprise I had no big follicles. I had one that was 7mm and a lot of little ones. This is not what I was hoping for. They have upped my dose to 50 IU tonight and tomorrow night. I will have another ultrasound Wednesday morning. I guess I should not be suprised that this doesnt come easy for me. Nothing else has. I know that I sound a little negative, but I am just venting. In all reality I am still very hopeful. I just want to be a mom. Is that too much to ask.

Stims

2009-07-18T17:36:00.000-07:00

Sea, me and the Bla.Bla doll for the baby!

The most goofy picture of me and my stims

Tonight was my first night of stims. I am suprised that I wasn't nervous about giving myself the shot. I guess the pen takes all the guess work out of it. Our great friends Sea and her DH came over to support. I wanted them to be there incase I did something wrong. They are old pros so it was nice to have them here. We had pizza and made a "shot party" out of it. We were also celebrating their pregnancy!!! So happy for them. So, it was easier than I thought. Not painful at all. Good thing. It was a great night. Sea is going with me to my ultrasound on Monday morning. I hope that these meds have been doing something down there. I have heard of people with dossages of 100 or more on their first round of Folli,stim. I am only doing 33.3. Is this high enough? I surely dont know. Maybe I just need to trust the doctor. That is why he is a Dr. after all. I will let you know how the ultasound goes on monday. Fingers crossed and lots of prayers!!!!

Fermera

2009-07-16T13:17:00.000-07:00

So today is day cycle day five of my in my first IUI cycle. I have taken 3 days of Fer.mera so far. I am feeling very anxious about everything. I am kind of willing my ovaries to make some nice follies. I start my folli.stim Saturday night. My wonderful friend Sea is coming over to help me with my first shot. I was there for her first shot, and she is returning the favor. She will also be going with me on Monday to have my next ultrasound. What a great friend. Maybe she will be good luck for me, since she just found out that she is PREGGERS! It is so awesome for her and her hubby. I am so happy for them. They really deserve this. It is so nice to have a built in support who is going through the same thing. I wondering what is going on inside me right now. Hope it is good.

YES this month

2009-07-11T15:31:00.000-07:00

Started spotting today, on my own. Cant believe it. So we are going to go ahead with the IUI before our vacation at the end of the month. I hope that it works out and we can leave for the beach on time, but DH is cool if we are a couple of days late to the beach. I am feeling pretty good about this. I am the most excited about the TTC journey than I have been in a long time. I am very hopeful. If I did become pregnant during this cycle we would find out right around my husband's 30th birthday. Wouldnt that be the best present ever? I will keep you updated. If the past in any indication, Monday will be Day 1 of my cycle. I am praying already!

RE Consult

2009-07-10T13:39:00.000-07:00

On the way to the RE

Pulling in

On the way home and feeling hopeful!

So we headed out this morning to our RE appoinment. On the way we wrote down questions that we had, because I knew that when we were sitting in front of the doctor everything would go right out of my head. But, we did not really need the list of questions. the doctor answered them all before we could ask. He says that we are great candidates for IUI. Since I have PCOS he thinks that the ovulation induction is the right treament for us. He also thinks that my recent 23 pound weightloss will be a "big victory" for us. We will not be able to start a cycle this month, but will start once we get back from the beach at the begining of Aug. They have already ordered our medicine so that we will have it and be ready to roll when we get back. The great this is that we dont have to purchase Follistim (our insurance doesnt touch IF treatments). Our awesome friend Sea is giving us her leftover, unopened 900 IU cartridge from her IVF cycle. She is the most amazing friend. This is going to save us big bucks. We offered to pay her for it, but she would not hear of it. She wants to see us pregnant as much as we want it. I love her for her support and friendship. I could not have asked God to send me a better friend. We have been going through IF together and it has been great having that support system. She and her DH just finished their IVF cycle and are waiting for their beta. Please keep them in your prayers. I will keep you posted on our progress. Yay for first IUI!!!

Adoption

2009-07-09T11:30:00.001-07:00

Adoption has really been on my heart. I just am not sure that a 20% success rate for IUI is enough to pay all of that money. I already know that IVF is not for me. Adoption is a natural choice for me. I myself and adopted and have always been very open to the idea of building my own family through adoption. I have talked to many agencies and just dont know which one would be right for us. Does anyone have any suggestions? What to do, what to do?

Not this month

2009-07-06T18:57:00.000-07:00

Well, no IUIthis month. I spoke with my RE nurse today and she says that since I have not started my period that this month will not work for IUI. Another road block. Of course. This is just what IF is about. One disapointment after another. I never thought I would be angry about spending a week at the beach for vacation. But of course we cant do a IUI cycle because we will be going out of town and the timing is not right. What is up? I finally am ready to move on to IUI and this happens. Oh well, still have an appointment with RE Friday. We will see what he says. In the mean time I am willing my period to start. Bring it on Flow. I am ready for you.

Lake Lure

2009-07-06T10:07:00.000-07:00

DH and I were able to spend July 4th weekend at my favorite place in the world, Lake Lure. My families lake house has always been the most wonderful place. Wil even proposed to me there. We were able to relax and just be together. It was wonderful. Now I am getting nervous about my RE appoinment on Friday. We really want to try an IUI this cycle, but of course I have to go in and met with the RE because we have not been to the clinic in a long time. I have all these things running through my head right now. We have a vacation coming at the end of the month and I dont know if we will be able to get through an IUI before we have to leave. I havent started my period and dont know when I will. It is just a lot going through my head right now. I am also nervous that if I do get pregnant that I will loose another baby and I dont think I can handle that. I have a friend who has just finished an IVF cycle and I am praying that it works for her. It just seems like every though I have is baby, baby, baby. Keep us in your prayers.

Prayers

2009-06-30T07:11:00.000-07:00

Please keep my friends in your prayers. Today they are going through their first egg retrival for IVF. I so hope that this works for them and that God gives them their hearts desire. They will make amazing parents. Anyway, please keep them in your prayers. It can only help!

IUI Journey

2009-06-29T17:02:00.000-07:00

After two years of infertility we have decided to embark on our first IUI. I am so nervous about it. I am not sure if it will be worth it. There is only a %20 chance of getting pregnant. I dont want to be a glass half empty kind of girl, but I am scared. It is a lot of money and a part of me wonders if it would be better spent towards adoption costs. I spoke to an awesome woman toady about adoption. I just feel like it is the way to go, but I want Wil to feel like we have tried everything. I dont want him to feel like I am pressuring him into anything. I know that he would love to have a biological child, but I know that it is not the important thing. The greatest gift would be able to be parents, not matter how we get there. We will see what happens. We have a doctors appointment next Friday to discuss our next step with infertility treament. I think IUI is what we will do. Wil wants to give it a try. Keep us in your prayers. We have taken other fertility medication, but this is a big step. Wil wants to at least give it a try, so we will. I love him and want him to be happy.